Apprehension

So, I guess I'm not having the laparoscopic surgery done next week. The nurse finally got back in touch with me yesterday and scheduled it for next week, with a couple of trips to Tulsa beforehand for pre-op appointments. Last night, I got home and just felt completely overwhelmed. It was scheduled for the 12th, and I need to rest for two days after the surgery, but I am supposed to leave for New York on the 15th in the morning. I always get stressed and worry for a few days before any trip. I didn't used to be this way, but ever since I lived in Italy and had a few "travel experiences from hell" (I'll tell you some whopper stories later), I just get all tightened up before a big trip. I am apprehensive enough about this surgery, I just don't think that I can do both at the same time. Last night, I found myself in anxious tears thinking about it all. So I'm just not going to do this to myself this month.

Plus (and I know this is probably a stupid reason) my dog is going to have her puppies any time between now and when I'm in New York, and I'm also worried about that.

On a completely unrelated note, I want to apologize to Liz Phair for calling her a sellout. Jason got me her new CD, and I was like, "Okay, I'll listen to it, but I'm going to hate it. Nyah." But, wonder of all wonders, it's pretty good. Not as good as "Exile in Guyville" (a really great angry chick album/pre-Alannis) but actually pretty good. She doesn't drop the "f-bomb" quite as much, but that might be a step forward for her. I guess we're all growing up and that's okay.