Monday, June 14, 2004

The Right Dress

My sister made an interesting comparison today. She is getting married in October and having a really hard time finding the right bridesmaid dresses. She has seven bridesmaids, all different sizes, and Karen’s goal is to find a dress that is inexpensive and her maids can wear again. I think this goal is very noble, but unrealistic. She is discovering this, and is extremely frustrated.

Every "maybe" dress that she finds is either way too expensive, comes only in the color avocado or isn’t something you’d ever wear again. She gets so close and thinks she’s found the perfect’s working...she has it in her sights...the search is finally over...and WHAM. It’s $250.

She told me today, "I don’t mean this to sound insensitive, but in a small way, this must be what infertility feels like." Hmmmm....I thought about that.

It is kind of like it. Except imagine, if you will...emotionally, fifty times worse, and it happening month after month after month. And every time you discover that the dress is $250, you also start bleeding profusely. And most of your friends and acquaintances are getting daily accidental shipments of free beautiful dresses that they begin wearing every day. You try not to be jealous, because those dresses are lovely, but they wouldn’t fit your bridesmaids anyway. Unfortunately, some of the receivers of the accidental dresses spend a lot of time bragging or complaining about their dress in front of you.

Well-meaning but clueless loved ones (and casual acquaintances) begin telling you that you are trying too hard to find the right dress, and even insinuating that it’s your own fault for being too picky. Some of them tell you that if you would just decide on getting pants instead (which are also lovely, but you are still wanting a dress at this time), then the perfect dress will just arrive at your door.

And sometimes, you will have to eventually put a second mortgage on your house to get the dress, because there is something wrong with your mailbox and catalogs won’t fit in it properly. Therefore, you pay the mailman a large sum of money to bring the catalogs directly to you every day.

Oh, and every time the mailman comes, he also sticks a large needle in your butt.

Hope this didn't offend. :)


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