Sunday, November 14, 2004

Childbirth Class

Well, we conquered "Prepared Childbirth" yesterday. It was actually pretty good. Learning all the stages of labor, preparing the husbands for their wives' cursing, seeing the tube they are going to insert into my spine. I enjoyed everything except for the breathing exercises. We laid on the floor and breathed "Hee Hee Hee Hoo." I wasn't embarrassed or anything, but I guess I'm a realist. I told Jason, "Does she actually believe that people remember this stuff in the throws of labor?" I think that I'd probably just do whatever I had to--throw chairs, squat on the floor, sing "Baby Got Back" at the top of my lungs. I also don't like people telling me how long my breaths have to be. I've never liked that. One of the reasons why I quit yoga. I will let out my air when I darn well please.

I've been thinking about Amie's comment from my last post. She's right...I know that I'll look back on this pregnancy and wonder why I got so upset at such silly stuff. When I looked around our childbirth class, everyone looked fairly similiar to me. Happy, with a little fear in their eyes, jumping up every hour to go pee. I even met a girl due 2 days after me (who got preggers through IVF) and we were very much the same size. I think that I'm going to do okay at this childbirth thing, and motherhood too.

I just get so focused on the most trivial issues. I've never dealt with jealousy and second-guessing myself as much as I have these past six months. Is my baby kicking enough? (YES) Am I just a wussy for wanting an epidural? (NO) Is Jason using a "tone" with me? (PROBABLY NOT BUT HE'D BETTER APOLOGIZE ANYWAY)

My dear, giving friend Shelley (thank you again!!!!) came over today with a huge tub of baby clothes and toys to loan to me. She pulled out each little baby outfit fondly, patted it tenderly and knew where every one of them had come from. Now, I remember her first baby year (as does she) and it was very difficult. But it was nice to see that the bad memories were fading and the good ones were staying. That's probably how pregancy will be also.


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