Things That Seem To Soothe A Screaming Anna

-loudly singing "Hooked On A Feeling" (the Ooga Chocka version, not the wussy version)

-swing (approximately 2 minutes)

-bouncer (approximately 3 minutes)

-drinking a strawberry daiquiri and then breastfeeding (please don't call DHS on me)

-bath (approximately 10 minutes or until water gets cold)

-staring at a light bulb

-walking around outside (unless it's raining)

-pulling her legs up over her head until she farts

-"100 Most Metal Moments" on VH1. (for some reason, she was pretty happy yesterday during all five hours of the heavy metal show, as well as the Metallica documentary)