Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Musings from the World of Cabin Fever

1) I both loathe and am addicted to "Celebrity Fit Club" on VH1. How did they find eight of the most self-centered and egotistical people on the planet and convince them to stand on a giant scale? I think that they have lost a total of about four pounds, because everyone refuses to do what the dietician and exercise instructor tell them to do. I hate this show. Yet I cannot turn away.

2) The other day, the thought suddenly occured to me that I was no longer suffering from morning sickness. About the same time that my husband realized that he was still scooping my cats' litter box for no good reason.

3) I've decided that no one is allowed to give me advice about nighttime feedings unless they are willing to get up with me.

4) For the first time in my life, I find myself pondering which is more important to me...75 bags of frozen breastmilk or rainbow sherbet?

5) Stupid romantic dumbass movies. I found myself sucked into and crying at the end of "The Notebook" against my better judgement. Argh.

6) At four in the morning, this whole "getting one hour of sleep at a time" seems like a big cosmic joke. Are you allowed to slip Ambien to a five week old? No?

7) My boss recently told me, "I really miss you. Hurry up and come back to work." I said, "Can't find anything, can you?" "Er, no...." he muttered. Ha ha! My work is done. I have job security. I have rendered my boss useless without me. My plan worked.

8) I have got to get out of this house. Or I may go mad.


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