Tuesday, December 09, 2003

Strife in the office. My boss and a fellow coworker ended up yelling at each other this afternoon and now everyone is tense and on edge. I hate conflict. I went and sat in the bathroom for awhile with my head in my hands. I have decided that, after this, I am not working for another Christian organization ever again. When overt religion and work get mixed in together, it gets all complicated. And claustrophobic.

I feel very stressed about it. I wasn't really involved, but I just feel bad about the whole thing. Kiss and make up! Kiss and make up! I don't think it's going to happen this time. My boss said some stuff that went over the line-- like "Typical woman reaction!" or something like that. Donna was furious. She yelled at him to get in his office because she didn't want to talk to him anymore. I think she meant permanently. Then he left the building and she started crying her eyes out. The thing is, Donna was in the wrong but my boss really crossed the line.

Why is life so hard? Why are relationships so difficult, and work so unpleasant? Lately, all that runs through my head is worry or negative feelings towards others. I don't think it's supposed to be this way. Maybe it is, I don't know. There are people out there who enjoy their jobs. I see articles about them in my Mary Engelbreit magazines. They sit in their studios and make adorable art that customers scoop up for lots of money. Even in this building, I think that there are people who enjoy their jobs. Many people who do. I see them busy at their desks or smiling to other people in the halls. My husband generally enjoys his job. But it seems like everyone who is near me, hates it.

I know that I have talked about this before....sorry. I am in a funk today.


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